When Eating Becomes a Coping Mechanism
- Kristin Kurian
- Feb 7
- 3 min read
February is Eating Disorder Awareness Month. Often, this time of year highlights the most visible or extreme experiences related to food and eating. But many struggles don’t look dramatic from the outside. They’re quieter, more controlled, and easy to miss.
Sometimes, eating becomes a coping mechanism - not because something is “wrong,” but because it offers steadiness when life feels stressful, pressured, or uncertain.
In those moments, eating isn’t the whole problem. It’s part of how someone is getting through.
When Eating Patterns Shift During Stress
For some people, their relationship with food and eating changes when life feels unsettled.
That shift might look like:
Leaning more heavily on routines around food and eating
Feeling calmer when eating follows clear rules
Noticing appetite changes during stressful periods
Using control around food and eating to create predictability
These patterns often emerge during transitions, such as increased academic pressure, social stress, disrupted routines, or taking on new responsibilities.
From the outside, things may appear fine. Internally, the nervous system may be working harder to regain balance.
Finding Steadiness When Everything Else Feels Unsettled
Periods of change disrupt rhythm. They reduce certainty and can leave people feeling disoriented.
When a lot feels in flux, eating can become something solid to hold onto. It’s familiar. It’s structured. It offers a sense of order when other parts of life feel less predictable.
When eating becomes a coping mechanism, it’s often an attempt to create safety, not a sign of vanity, poor discipline, or a desire to control others.
When It’s Not About Weight or Appearance
Not all eating struggles are driven by body image.
For many people, eating becomes a coping mechanism because it helps manage internal overwhelm. Routine and predictability around eating can temporarily ease anxiety, especially when emotions feel intense or hard to name.
When eating patterns are viewed only as something to fix or stop, it’s easy to miss what they’re actually doing: helping someone cope in the best way they currently know how.
How Shame Keeps Eating Patterns Quiet
Many people minimize their experience because it doesn’t match what they think an eating disorder is supposed to look like.
They may find themselves thinking:
“I’m still functioning.”
“Other people have it worse.”
“I should be able to handle this.”
Shame tends to keep eating-related struggles hidden. It can also make change feel risky. When coping strategies are treated as failures rather than signals, the stress underneath often goes unaddressed.
Awareness begins with curiosity, not judgment.
Noticing Eating Patterns With Compassion
Eating Disorder Awareness Month isn’t about diagnosing yourself or forcing change. It’s about noticing patterns with kindness.
You might gently reflect on questions like:
What role does eating play for me when I’m under stress?
When things feel overwhelming, what helps me feel steadier?
What might these eating patterns be trying to support or protect?
There are no right answers here. Just information.
If You Recognize Yourself or A Loved One Here
Eating can become a way of coping without it meaning you’ve failed or done something wrong.
If and when the timing feels right, support is available.
About the Author
Kristin is a Registered Psychotherapist and the founder of A New Perspective Psychotherapy in Toronto. She works with teens, young adults, and parents, supporting people navigating anxiety, transitions, and eating-related concerns with a compassionate, non-judgmental approach. Kristin’s work is grounded in evidence-based, trauma-informed care, with a focus on understanding behaviours as meaningful responses to stress rather than problems to be fixed. She offers both ongoing therapy and extended sessions, depending on a client’s needs and readiness.
